Beginner Strap On for People Trying Strap-Ons for the First Time

People of all genders and sexualities love to use strap-ons, but it can be intimidating when you’re looking for your first one. Here’s what to look out for and our favorite beginner-friendly option.

Whether you are new to the wonderful world of strap-ons or you could just use a refresher, here are a few of the most common types of strap-ons you’re likely to find.

The most classic strap-on out there will be a good, old-fashioned dildo. While there are endless variations to what dildos can look and feel like, the idea is always the same. It can be used for penetrative play, but might not vibrate or come with other unique functions.

You can’t just use any dildo as a strap-on, though. You need to make sure the one you choose is compatible with your harness. You can skip this issue by getting a convenient set (we’ll suggest one of our top picks later in the article), or you can do a bit more research before buying.

For a dildo to be compatible with a harness, it needs to have a flared or flat base that can fit into the provided hole. No, not that hole. We mean the hole that is on the front of the harness. 

Make sure that the size is correct so that there won’t be any unforeseen slipping when you’re trying to get down and dirty.

For those who enjoy a little something extra, you can opt for a vibrating dildo to use as a strap-on. Like with classic dildos, you will have to make sure that it fits correctly into the harness. Otherwise, it can still be used for penetrative sex, but it might not be the right choice as a strap-on.

We will be honest here — while strapless strap-ons are undoubtedly awesome, they might not be the best choice for someone just getting the hang of it. Strapless strap-ons work by inserting part of it into (or suctioning onto) the wearer and the other part into the receiver. 

This is a fantastically intimate sexual experience, but it might be better left for when you have more time or experience.

Everyone’s dream strap-on will be unique to them since we all have individual needs and wants in the bedroom. What sounds just right to some people might be out of the question for others. No one way is right or wrong; it’s just a matter of knowing yourself and your body.

If you are still trying to figure out what feels good to you, this is your time to experiment. Think about what you might like, and be ready to try new things for the first time. 

Putting yourself out there is the only way to discover what works for you. And the good news is that you can have plenty of fun along the way.

Here are a few of the biggest factors to consider in your first strap-on.

Those newer to penetrative play will likely look at the size above nearly all other factors. If you are not used to using larger toys or having penetrative sex, it is a good call to start with something smaller. This will be both a physical and mental comfort to you since you know you’re starting with something you can handle.

Remember that you can always stick with that size or graduate to the next step up. Either way, your first strap will always be there cheering you on from the sidelines.

As we mentioned, a classic dildo is where people often like to start when kicking off their strap-on journey. That is not always the case, though. If you know that you or your partner enjoys vibrators, for instance, then a vibrating strap might be the right call for you. 

If that’s the case, look no further than the Vac-U-Lock G-Spot Vibrating Pleasure Set. This set is especially great for people with vaginas since it was specially made to target the G-spot. 

It hits the spot just right with a slight upward curve. Meanwhile, the vibrating function comes with seven different modes, so there’s a perfect speed and pattern for everyone.

It can be tempting to cheap out somewhat on a strap-on, especially if this is your first time using one. After all, what if you decide you don’t like it or only want to use it once in a blue moon? While that is a possibility, anything you insert in your body is not an item to cheap out on.

Getting a cheaper strap that lasts less time, is less versatile, and might not feel as pleasurable is not an accurate depiction of what strap-ons are really like. We aren’t saying you should go bankrupt when looking for a strap, but resist the temptation to go for the cheapest option.

When you are shopping for strap-ons for the first time, you might be shocked (and excited) by the number of looks you can choose from. There's a lot to consider, from curved to straight, penis-like to more abstract, skin-colored, or rainbow. A strap-on can really be an extension of yourself, which is why they are also often used for reasons related to gender affirmation.

The reason you choose a certain strap-on can be as simple as you liked the color or as intricate as the design feels like a natural extension of yourself. Look at the many strap-ons out there, and know that you don’t have to decide immediately. The strap-ons will be there waiting for you whenever you’re ready.

There might be other considerations that you have when shopping for your first strap-on, but the last one that we would like to highlight is incredibly important. Similar to how strap-ons are all different sizes and with different looks, they can also be made out of unique materials.

Consider if you or your partner have any sensitivities to ingredients, and avoid them. Also, remember that certain kinds of lube are incompatible with some toy materials. For instance, silicone lube and silicone toys don’t play well with each other. The lube can wear away at the toy over time.

If you are using a silicone toy, we recommend opting for a water-based lubricant instead.

While we love all of our wonderful strap-ons, there’s a reason this Tantus Bend Over Set has “beginner” in the name. You’re still in for a world of pleasure, whether giving or receiving. However, this set serves as a perfect introduction to the world of strap-on sex.

Since this set comes with both the dildo and the harness, you don’t have to worry about them being incompatible. As time passes and you get more comfortable with mixing and matching, you can venture out into getting more harnesses and straps. In the meantime, though, you want a combination that you know will work.

The Tantus Bend Over Set has a cute and simple harness emblazoned with purple trim. The straps themselves are a complementary shade of purple, creating an overall very attractive look. While we are talking straps, let’s gush over the fact that there are two of them. 

This set comes with two different strap-on attachments so that you can cater to your and your partner's needs. At the same time, having straps of different sizes means that this set can grow with you as your wants evolve and change. Regarding versatility, there isn’t a better deal on the market.

But the versatility doesn’t end with just a difference in size. While getting used to a strap-on, you can use the smaller dildo until you feel totally at ease. Then, you can move on to the bigger one or go in a different direction entirely. The harness vibrates, which is a treat for the one getting strapped and the one wearing the strap.

With patience, communication, and a can-do attitude, your strap-on experience will surely be illuminating.

Sources:

G-Spot Scientifically Identified | Medical News Today

The Role of Gender Affirmation in Psychological Well-Being Among Transgender Women | PMC

Lubricants for the promotion of sexual health and well-being: a systematic review | PMC